Short Term Car Insurance and Flying Cows

I can see the funnel from the front yard. It looks to be about 2 miles away and is headed right for us. I need to find a phone pronto! You see, I have a í67 corvette in the garage over yonder and it ainít insured. If that tornado stays on course, Iíll never see it again. I never drive anyway since Betsy died. Itís just not the same. Betsy was a good dog.

The internet is down so I can't get to  If I can get a hold of Jack Brown, over at the insurance place, he can slap some short term car insurance on the vette before my life is literally turned upside down. Jack has helped me before when it comes to stuff like this. He was the one that told me about short term car insurance to begin with. You know, Jack kind of looks like the guy who was on Dancing with the Stars, but was eliminated after the first round.

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The sky has gotten much darker over the last few minutes. You can feel the ground rumble if you try. The tornado is now about a mile away. It has taken a path down old route 87, wiping out the dairy farms that line the highway. Iíll be finding cows in the trees in the morning. The last big tornado we had managed to dodge every building along its 5 mile journey. We arenít so lucky this time.

Through my binoculars, Iím shocked to see hundreds Ė maybe thousands of cows caught up in the violent whirlwind. Some are upside-down, some are sideways and some appear to just be standing. There are a few calves and they spin around faster than the big cows do. I wonder if itís an optical illusion or some scientific theory? The cows look like kids in a Ďfun-wheelí at the carnival, pinned to the interior walls of a giant, spinning tube. Unfortunately for the cows, thereís no rising floor to come greet them as the spinning comes to halt.

The funnel gets closer and closer and I can actually hear cows landing with a Ďthudí as the storm gets within spitting distance of my house. Chickens are dropping like flies as well. Their feathers are gone and it looks like a smorgasbord of plucked fryers spinning overhead as they too drop one by one from the blackened sky. Was that a flying pig that just missed my head? Yes it was and one just landed on the porch swing, squealing in delight at finding the only soft spot to land in all the chaos. Isnít there a saying about pigs flying?

One minute Iím watching Wheel of Fortune, with a plate of fried baloney on my lap and the next Iím watching falling cows start to rain on my garage. Why I didnít get short term car insurance for the corvette is beyond me. Jack Brown even called me a while back and told me I needed to cover my car with short term car insurance. I remember asking him what could possibly happen to the car sitting in the garage?

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